Where's My Motivation?

Not Here, That's for Sure

So, here I am with three good horses, two I can ride for sure and one still a bit iffy....

Do I ride? No.  Today it's hot again so it's hard to get myself up for going out, tacking up and riding.  I still have my cold, so that's another excuse. 

But really, years ago, neither the heat nor the sniffles would have stopped me.  I was totally immersed in riding and training.  I accomplished tremendous things with my horses.  I jumped big fences and have garbage bags full of ribbons to prove my success.  I moved two horses up to FEI dressage levels and competed there.  Granted my success at that level was not amazing, but just being able to enter the arena was an accomplishment. 

So what happened?  Is it the frustration Tucker brought into the picture?  That never stopped me before.  And besides, no one can ever say Chance has no potential and he certainly has a good attitude. 

I have the horses at home, so traveling to a boarding stable's no barricade.  I have a nice sand arena right here too, so no battles with other riders for a place to ride. 

I do know that part of the problem is that some of my physical issues are impacting me more than I'd like.  My knees hurt and there's not much more I can do about it aside from major replacement surgery, something I am trying to avoid.  My surgery in December really did knock some of the energy out of me, and a bit of my ambition.  Although I have recovered physically, I'm not so sure my mindset is back to normal, but then again, I wasn't riding a lot before the surgery either, so I can't use that as a total excuse. 

Frankly, I've gotten lazy.  And, maybe going back to teach wasn't the best idea for me in some ways.  I hadn't quite settled into retirement yet and suddenly, I was back in the classroom, working hard.  Even though I have been merely a substitute, I found it impossible not to give the best effort possible, including a lot of extra work. 

But, as I think of it, that too is part of the problem.  I have to change my thought patterns a bit.  I tend to be the kind of person who never tackles a job partway.  If I go out to weedwhack...another job that needs doing again...I can't seem to stop before every weed is conquered.  What I need to learn is how to tackle jobs a little at a time and walk away satisfied even when a task is half done, with part of it saved for tomorrow. 

So, I need to approach the horse thing with the same mindset.  If I simply weed whack half of the front bank in a day, that's OK.  And if I ride one horse a day and don't do anything with the other two, that should be fine too. 

Today, I picked up eight bales of hay in the morning. Perhaps, on a hot day, that's enough of a chore--aside from taking care of the Boys.  If I set lower goals, they certainly will be easier to meet, especially with my physical limitations.   When I first retired, I told myself I needed to accomplish at least one little job a day.  I think redefining "little" may help me.  What I need to do is a little at a time. 

Sorry for going on about this, but I do feel kind of guilty knowing I have three lovely Boys here I'm not riding. 

Then again, I'm not sure the Boys care.  They seem quite content to just hang out, just being horses.

Oh, speaking of which...latest plan for Tucker's hoof.  I did have some Forshner's hoof  packing here. So I am going to stuff the hole with some Betadine soaked cotton and then stick it in place with the hoof packing.  I will see if that stays in place better than the bandages--which do come off and let dirt into the hole.  I'll let you know how it works.